Hey there!
I teach parents like you how to love the kid they have, rather than the kid they imagined.
I’m an expert on how to adapt parenting in ways that best meet children’s needs, with fewer power struggles, and most importantly, ensure kids thrive in every situation.
ignite your passion...
Are you a parent who feels challenged with growing demands trying every strategy, but frustrated with the results?
Do you sometimes respond to your kids with whatever comes to mind, without purposeful thought, and then regret it later?
Do you worry that you are missing something that could significantly affect your children later in life?
Perhaps you…
- Worry about balancing support while also encouraging independence.
- Waste time and energy battling power struggles.
- Want to be more confident in your parenting style and approach.
If any of this sounds like you, then I hereby declare you NORMAL.
I’ve been there. In some ways, I’ll always be there. However, I also believe there’s hope. There are no guarantees, but it is possible to more confidently parent with purpose and passion.
After nearly 30 years into this journey, I have discovered critical core values on which to build a solid family foundation.
I believe…
- Children are worthy of love and joy without condition.
- Children learn best through healthy boundaries and communication.
- Children behave best when they feel valued and accepted.
- Children thrive only when trust is built and maintained with caregivers.
Mostly, I no longer agree with the belief that parents’ primary role is to tame children through the use of punishments and rewards.
What if instead of punishing and bribing you could gently uncover the real issues and find solutions that work? Wouldn’t it feel great to parent alongside your kids knowing you’re building a healthy relationship that will last a lifetime?
If this is you, then you’re in the right place.
I’m Tammy, a teacher and parent, creator of Tammy’s Teachings.
my story
It was the 1990s.
Cell phones didn’t have cameras, which was okay because social media didn’t exist. Movie night at home required a trip to the video store to find a movie and microwave popcorn (of course).
I had my own ideas about parenting and education. After all, I had a Master’s Degree in Special Education and a few years of teaching under my belt.
My ideas worked pretty well until I had children.
When both of my children were in school the challenges increased, while my confidence decreased. Back in the day, we either depended on our friends and family for advice, or we had to go to the library or bookstore (remember there was no Internet).
I soon discovered John Rosemond’s book, “Parenting Power”. With the best of intentions, I began implementing harsher punishments with little empathy for my kid’s feelings. We had few discussions about why they occasionally made bad decisions or sometimes received low grades.
I believed I had to maintain control or else my children may become entitled. Heaven forbid, right?
Unfortunately, we parented this way throughout most of my kid’s childhood. Though my children are now independent, amazing young adults, I could have done a better job of showing them unconditional love.
I’m not saying I was a bad parent. I am saying I was too heavily influenced by culture and my own childhood. Even with all the degrees and training on behavior management, I could’ve done better.
“I was a wonderful parent before I had children.” ~ Adele Faber
If I had it to do over again, I would…
- Light up when they entered the room.
- Model healthy vulnerability.
- Accept emotional needs with empathy and without judgment.
- Play more.
- Punish less.
- Show unconditional love even when, especially when, they didn’t meet my expectations.
I’ve learned a lot since the 1990s. Thankfully, it’s never too late to become a better parent. It’s now 2020. Parenting is more complicated than ever!
If your desire is to parent in ways that completely align with your values, eliminating the heavy burden of societies’ hidden expectations, then you’re in the right place.
Join me and an ever-growing group of parents as we learn to parent with purpose and passion.
about me
In a way, I’m your stereotypical San Diego native. In my spare time (what’s that?) I love to read, write, draw, and catch beautiful sunsets with a camera in hand. In fact, you can find many of my photographs and drawings scattered throughout Tammy’s Teachings.
Most importantly, my husband of 30+ years (yikes) and I are proud parents of two adult children (and one sassy dog). Jacob and Alex both graduated from out of state universities and are currently pursuing their career goals. Sugar (the fluffiest of the three) majors in sleeping all day and barking when she’s not supposed to.
Here are some degrees, and such, that matter a lot in education, but don’t buy me a lot of clout with my own kids. I still earned them nonetheless.
- National Board Certified Teacher
- District Teacher of the Year, 2007
- Taught special and general education
- Master’s in Special Education
- Administrative Services Credential
- Coordinator for San Diego Office of Education (2007 – 2017)
- Director for National Board for Professional Teaching Standards (2017 – 2018)
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